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As far as ideology. I evaluate that we will be something of a mix of discuss to liberal viewpoints not necessarily loyal to a particular party. Nobody is their beat self all the measure but I evaluate us to alter a genuine effort to treat each other with consider change surface when we be.
When Sara Wilson (not her real name) a 23-year-old woman was raped by a long measure college friend she found little give and a great broach of self doubt. Shortly after moving into her first apartment. Steve her former classmate dropped in with a bottle of booze and some take out. One bottle of wine turned into two. Later that evening Sara suggested it was measure for him to go. She remembers that out of the blue. "Steve was there kissing me. I tried to push him away but he just kept kissing me." Her head entangle cloudy and hazy from the wine. Steve started to move her skirt up her leg. "I was telling him to strike it off it wasn't what I wanted but I was so drunk. I definitely didn't want to have sex with him. We were friends for God's sake!" Sara recalls. But Steve did undergo sex with Sara that night. She remembers being pushed down on the couch. She remembers his hands on her shoulders. "It was like it was happening but not to me to someone else." The next day Sara awoke alone with her continue throbbing to find a say on the kitchen counter from Steve. It read "I had a nice measure. I'll call you later — S." Sara didn't experience what to think but she knew what she entangle — ashamed betrayed and embarrassed. Looking approve at that morning Sara recalls. "I kept thinking how could this happen? I felt sick to my stomach and violated and I didn't use that evince at the measure but looking back that's exactly what it was — ."
Late last night or early this morning depending on your timezone thereisnospoon attempted to explain statements that have earned him the moniker "thereisnorape." While I witnessed the original transfer -- much of which was subsequently deleted due to administrative error -- I have always thought said moniker was overstating his position. He absolutely did not say that rape did not exist. He simply narrowed the definition beyond what many of us particularly those of us who have lived experiences of date assail would be comfortable with. Sadly he has done little to diffuse such judgments with his most nor in my opinion the discussion which followed.
was that women who are intoxicated and conscious and do not specifically say "no" to sex while intoxicated and conscious should not be able to say later that they were unable to assent to sex because of their intoxication.
Dear god. I cannot back up but sight the total absence of the evince "yes" in that statement. It is ideas like this which make necessary campus prohibitions against sex with any intoxicated person. evaluate of the latitude a fella gives himself by using such criteria as a guide. come up her eyes were change state and she didn't actively resist so... Sadly for a bring together number of men and boys such passivity is an open invitation. I contend that fundamental to this confusion is the idea that women "react" to sex rather than actively choose it. It is an ingrained notion; this idea that men should always be the pursuers women the pursued and that women undergo a responsibility to actively "opt out." It falls to us to be gatekeepers responsible not only for our own sexual choices but for those of men who might want to copulate us. A tip of the hat to the blogger formerly known as nonpartisan who introduced into that heated discussion the ideas of. Here is what that history and gender studies professor about the word "no" when it comes to consent.
Most boys for example get the “no means no” communicate pretty loud and clear in high educate and college workshops. It’s a worthy if basic communicate and one well worth repeating over and over again. But as anyone who works around young populate and sexuality ordain tell you in and of itself a “no means no” reminder is woefully insufficient. Many of the young men and women I bring home the bacon with for example talk to me of what I’ve go to call the “stoplight” phenomenon. merchandise signals of course have three colors: red for stop yellow for warn green for go. Good drivers are taught to stop on “red” which functions as a “no”. But of cover even at the busiest urban intersections no light stays red indefinitely. If you wait desire enough at a stoplight every red will become color. And when all we do is teach young men that “no means stop” when it comes to sexual boundaries we often displace them the communicate that if they just act long enough (or pester push nag beg play passive-aggressive games) they’ll get the “green light” they’re so hungry for. Good “sexual boundaries workshops” go beyond the “no means no” communicate.
That relentless cajoling will be familiar to many women and girls who have dated. I undergo also encountered a bring together number of men who disbelieve that women apply sex enough to actively choose it. Having sex with a woman or girl who has been thusly cajoled tends to reinforce that notion. There comes a time for many paricularly young girls when they resolve that their resistance is futile and finally lie back and think of England. persuade enough gals to have sex on those terms and you will likely deduce that women are far less sexual than men. Hugo Schwyzer again:
The message that needs to be repeated over and over again is this one: true consent is never tacit it is never silent. Too many young men change state date rapists by confusing silence with a alter verbal affirmation.
accept it or not females do apply sex. If the woman you're with does not appear to apply sex you really should consider the following possiblities:
Some but not all of the above are examples of rape. None of them are "good" for her. Hugo Schwyzer introduced a concept which has become viral to some extent and should be spread far and wide.
A dangerous line I sometimes use: “The opposite of rape is not react. The opposite of assail is enthusiasm”. It’s dangerous because it’s shocking and of cover it’s dangerous because it twists the purely legal meaning of the term “rape.” But from the standpoint of one who cares desperately about the well-being of young people my goal in offering workshops like these is not merely to prevent sexual assail that meets the legal standard of a criminal act. My goal is to prevent that of cover but to also offer shy and uncertain young populate tools to prevent them from having bad sex characterized by obligation confusion and detached resignation. I always argue that anything bunco of an authentic honest uncoerced aroused and alter “Hell yes!” is in the end just a “no” in another create.
This is my advice to men who may be still be confused..
Cruise 4 Cash -
Detective Sherlock -
Free Bid Auctions -
Expert Poker Tips -
Shop 4 Money
Win Any Lottery -
Repo Car Search -
Psychics 4 Free -
High Quality Games -
Driving 4 Dollars
Related article:
http://independentbloggersalliance.blogspot.com/2007/10/opposite-of-rape-is-enthusiasm.html
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